Tag Archive | satire

Actual advice for writing poetry, plus a poem that utilizes none of it

First off, you’re welcome for the ABSOLUTELY FREE NOTES I’m about to give you from my Very Professional Public High School Education. It’s your (or your parents’) tax dollars that paid for this, and I’m nothing if not completely willing to help you maximize your return on investment. Read and learn, then be completely befuddled by whatever may follow:

March 24, 2003: Satirical generic goth poem, plus class dynamics Read More…

Affleck and Robin

Affleck and Robin

As long as they cast Matt Damon as Robin, I’m all-in.

Best Pickup Line Ever

In the summer of 2006, I played saxophone and clarinet in the pit orchestra at Starlight Theater in Rockford for “State Fair,” a Rodgers and Hammerstein¬†musical about the Iowa State Fair (originally adapted from a book by Phil Stong, a Drake University graduate – go bulldogs!).

Anyway, a lot of the dialogue was a bit, um… well, cheesy. Apparently at one point, one of the characters awkwardly says “Can I buy you a corn dog or something?” I was not satisfied with that bit of dialogue, however, so I revised it for him:

2006Summer Corn Doggin


“Can I give you a corn doggin’ or something?”
-Best pickup line ever

So… that’s a thing that happened.

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